GROWTH VIS A VIS DEVELOPMENT

Some time ago, I was involved in a general discussion about what is growth and what is Development?

Growth is a more physical and material term and therefore has it's own limits. However, Development is not only physical & material, but something more abstract than just these and is infinite with no limits.

To illustrate this point, I told my friends about a friend whom I had known during my childhood. His name was 'Kulandaipichai' which when literally translated means "child given as alms".

He was a classmate of mine during my primary school days in an unknown / unheard off school in Chennai which was then 'Madras'. All that I used to remember of K.P. as we fondly called him was his loving mother who used to bring him to school , bring lunch during the afternoon break and then take him back home at the end of school. 

I remember feeling rather jealous of K.P. and used to look at him with envy, when his mother brought him to school or fed him lunch & eagerly stood at the school gate waiting for her son to come back at the stroke of the final bell for the day. His mother had lost her husband when he was very young and therefore showered all her love on K.P.

As the son of working parents, I never used to have the luxury of parents bringing me to and from school or bringing me lunch and have been forced to take care of myself from my early days. The kind of luxuries which K.P.enjoyed really rankled and I would literally look at him with green eyes.

Time flew and we parted ways. I moved on to a job in a non-governmental organization while K.P. went on to be a top notch financial whiz kid and was riding high on a crest in the corporate world. 

Over the years, I totally lost track of K.P. until I chanced upon him at a drive-in restaurant about two years ago. He was all agog at meeting me and was bubbling with life and enthusiasm. He gushed that he was happy to have met me and that it was providence that had brought us together since he was about to get married in a week. He handed me the wedding invitation and I wished him all the best while promising to attend the wedding without fail.

As promised, I participated in his marriage ceremony where I also happened to meet some of my old school chums - Guys who had kept track of K.P. and were still in touch with him. More than any thing, it seemed to me that these guys had kept in touch with K.P. only because he was a top notch corporate honcho. K.P. was really a lucky guy. His wife looked really lovely and serene. She looked like the kind of woman who could help her man build his career. What with a doting mother, K.P. now had a doting wife too!

Time flew by as it always does and I again lost track of K.P. since I was absorbed in my own work and obsessed with my own personal life. A couple of months ago I was driving my two-wheeler past a busy stretch on Mount Road, when I chanced to see his wife waiting at a bus stop. I was surprised, since K.P. was so rich and could easily afford three or four cars. I eased my bike to the side and parked it. I then proceeded to the bus stop and greeted K.P.'s wife with a "Hello Sis! How are you? How is K.P.?" The woman's face tightened on hearing K.P.'s name and she looked at me with sad eyes.

"Oh! My Husband? He is so happy with his mother that he doesn't need me at all. His mother takes care of all his needs and hence he doesn't need me at all. We have therefore separated and currently my father has taken steps to apply for our divorce", she replied rather sarcastically. 

I was surprised and rather taken aback to hear this. I then asked her what had gone wrong within one year of her marrying my friend. "What didn't go wrong?" she replied, "Right from the first day, from his morning coffee to his bath to his bed to his meals, everything had to be done by Mummy, that is his mother, who has made her son completely dependent on her. I am ashamed to say it but your friend needed his mother to even comb his hair or have his shave or tie his shoe laces".

"Initially, I tried to do things for him but he found fault with whatever I did. Mummy does it this way, Mummy does it better, He was always complaining and would only be happy if his mother did it for him. After a while I realized the futility of loving him and went back to my father's house where I have been living ever since. Since then I have found myself a small job and survive on the time I spend there as my work is a great diversion and I get paid to forget my personal life for a major part of the day", she said.

I was too stunned to even speak. Here was a hot-shot corporate whiz kid who needed his mother to even tie his shoe laces for him. What could I say? I mumbled my solemn responses and wished her farewell. Months later, I came to know from one of my school chums who had been there at K.P.'s wedding that divorce was granted on the same day that K.P. was made President of his company at the age of thirty four.

Now my friends, I hope you will be in a better position to enlighten me on the difference between growth and development?